Nuala Gardner 2008 on 'A Friend Like Henry'

A Friend Like Henry is such a brilliant story of how a dog helped an autistic boy communicate; Nuala Gardner Henry's mother has very kindly answered some questions for us.

DH: I loved this story of Dale and his dog Henry who helped to unlock his world. How as a family did you cope with this extraordinary situation?

NG: There were many factors involved to deal with the many challenging issues with coping and educating Dale, especially when we stumbled on using the dog.I think the main reason we did so well was that it pushed us to the limit - my strong marriage and how we worked together was vital. Also that we were wiling to go to any lenth to help Dale and before he got the dog he received about 18 hours intensive education a day. We found that if one of us was struggling - emotionally drained, the other was always the stronger to keep us going. After getting a diagnosis and the right educational input we were all on the same side. When the remarkable break through came via Henry, and progress went from a laborious 10% after 5yrs to 50% after three months that was all we needed to keep going and take Dale with Henry all the way.

DH: We hear of many dogs that do remarkable things for their owners, is this something that all Autistic Children would benefit from having to open up the world around them?

NG: I am convinced that as I have written a detailed account following 19yrs of "how and why" with an expert in the fields verification of the facts, let alone Dales own views explaining why the dog worked that this is an area that could help many other children. Following the sucess of the book I have been working closely with the Irish Assistance dogs program, where they have been training dogs for children with Autism about 50 at present with families. Also dogs for the disabled have started a pilot scheme to hopefully work with 16 families in the next year. I am working with both charities so that our two insights can meet to replicate as much as possible, the sucess I have documented in my book. So far even in this very early days it has shown a similar effect as Henry had on Dale and Amy. In view of this Dale and I want to work in this area to hopefully get a standard program that is condition specific and staged towards as much independence as possible, and supply dogs throughout all of the UK, not just England as it is just now.

DH: You say in the prologue that Henry chose Dale, do you think that is the way most dogs are around a child who has special needs.

NG: Quite simply, yes. I think all dogs are very sensitive and receptive animals for all people but especially to disabled children or the sick. This has been the case for years with the success of pet therapy in hospitals and homes for the elderly etc. Also in the last few years Dogs for the diisabled have had great sucess providing dogs for physically dissabled children. As well as the practical aspect the emotional bond and confidence given to these children is as many have said " the dog was the best thing in their life, and they couldn't imagine life without them" As Dale has revealed in the book the wonderful patient sociable and trusting nature of Henry was a major factor, especially his eyes.

DH: What was it like to bring up a child with such special needs.

NG: Very challenging, constant battle with authorities. Emotionally an physically draining but worth the effort.

DH: Do you think that having Henry has enabled Dale to do much more in his life than he would have done if you had not had him?

NG: I have no doubt that Dale having a dog has set him on a path he would never have been on without the dog. He would have turned out well but Henry and his two dogs now has given him security, responsibility and a sense of purpose in life. Due to AFLH and as I explained above he is hoping to gain his HNC in early education and childcare this year. His aim is to use this knowledge and hopefully with the ongoing work we are doing with Dogs for the disabled in Barnbury he hopes to train as a dog trainer for Scotland and continue the assistance dog for Autism program in Scotland.

DH: Do you feel that more people should know what Autism means and how it affects other members of the family?

NG: Yes. A friend like Henry is firstly a mainstream book. I have been delighted with the response from this readership as many have been shocked and really had their eyes open to the impact Autism has on the person and the whole family. Many parents and professionals have commented that AFLH is such a accurate and insightful account that they say I have taken the mystery out of the condition and anyone in all walks of life can read it and get an extrodinary deep knowledge of Autism.

DH: Did you find that help was hard to come by when you were fighting for Dale to be treated as a normal little boy who was locked in a world of his own?

NG: The two very powerful chapters in the book, "The War" part one and two, I think says it all regarding the horrific fight for Dale. Many people may think that this was too strong a term to describe this. But when you read these chapters and the events before them it is no doubt a war on the system and a bitter fight with ourselves to literarly survive this battle and in my case fight for my own life as well as to stop Dale's being destroyed.

DH: The story of Thomas the Tank engine is one I can relate to and to hear Dale's laughter must have been a great breakthrough for yourselves; Was this the way most of the breakthroughs into his silent world happened?

NG: Yes. Throughout all of the journey with Dale we were always lead by him, by using his obsessions as we went along. It wasn't until my mum showed us with that wonderful encounter with a tree how we could start to get our educational approach right. also we found that using humour got though to Dale. He learned more and would focus better if you made things funny. This is why when Henry himself made him laugh he really learned and understood.

DH: You talk in the book about the Glasgow Transport Museum, a wonderful place to go with a child, could he relate to their enormous size to the engines he saw on the television?

NG: At the end of the book Dale has given a very insightful explanation to a lot of things now that he couldnt explain at the time. I was shocked and surprised with what he revealed. This was very true regarding the size of the trains at the transport museum, and why he had such a horrific tantrum when he saw a real steam engine moving.

DH: Did Dale realise he was different or did he just accept that this was the way his life was?

NG: He didn't have any insight until about the age of 12; when having insight that he was different became a major problem in itself. This is why I spent some time in the book to show how this was impacting on his life and why we had to help him come to terms with having Autism.

DH: When Henry came to live with you it seemed to make the formality of having mealtimes a much easier time, for the family; because Dale learnt that when he ate Henry ate. Was this because there was a special routine now in place, and routine helped to give sum meaning to day and night?

NG: Yes. Although we tried everything to create a routine with Dale as all evets within this was a major battle for him to understand it became almost impossible and a daily battle. With Henry in our life and the daily routiene of caring for him all this started to make sense to Dale.

DH: Henry was to help in other situations to, like the Boys Brigade when Dale was due to go up to the senior section, but didn't want to give up his red jumper what made you think to put it on Henry to encourage this new step up in his life?

NG: As everything we did with Dale everyone involved at home and school would pich in with appraoches to help when problems like you describe arose. Even with all this input Dale found such a change difficult. As i knew he would do virtually anything Henry "asked" and using humour via the dog I knew this was well worth a try. As kids I had a dog and we would for fun dress the dog up for christmas, halloween etc; this is why I did the same with Henry as retrievers are so good natured they let you do almost anything with them. When we had all tried to get Dale to accept the red jumper it seemed the most obvious thing to do and we were all delighted it worked so well.

DH: How is Dale today has he found it hard in the grown up world or is he still getting support from other people in the community?

NG: Dale has turned out to be a fine young man with a lovely personality and everyone who knows and meets him are really struck by him. Many comment that they would never pick up that he has Autism. Dale has found that because of his Autism he has had to prove himself tenfold in comparison to peers that don't have a disabilty. He gets very annoyed with the lack of respect and understanding of his condition and has found that even now in spite of his sucess, professionals who should know better still treat him badly; seeing the Autism rather than him as a person let alone with all the abilty and talent he has. One factor for his continued sucess is as his parents we never stop fighting for him. Due to this he has been fortunate to get good support from social services and Prospects ( NAS Glasgow) and the Scottish Society for Autism.

DH: Do you feel that there is enough done for adults with Autism in the UK or have you just been lucky in that you had a good support worker to be with from the beginning?

NG: The situation for alll affected by autism on the spectrum is applalling from child to adult. Children are still not being diagnosed early enough and given the right educational input to thrive. This is particulary true of the kids on the Asperger end of the spectrum. In the majority of this the professionals involved are still condeming and blaming the parents, rather than their own professional failure. The sad reality of this is that due to lack of input autistic children become Autistic adults and deperately need help and support. The most frustrating issue as Dale and many of his friends on the spectrum have found. They have been lucky and can now funchion and take their rightful place in society, working like anyone else. If only goverment and "the system" would realise that Dale and the minority of others should be the majority. To put it into terms that rings a bell with them....it is cheaper for them in the long run.

DH: Have you been able to use your experiences with Henry and Dale to help local families with the possibility of going nationwide.

Since the very early days of attending support groups etc I have always strived to help other parents along the way. I have been very involved in helping some families locally throughout the years. However since the screening of After Thomas and the publication of AFLH I have been involved with many more families.

I have been really touched by the letters and emails from many families from Scotland, England, Australia and even Saudi Arabia. A family from Sidney Australia got in touch with me and I sent them some advice and information about assistance dogs as I had been in touch with a dog expert there who was looking at starting a program there. dale has helped some other kids around his own age and also went to spend a day at the new Struan Centre for Autism a world centre and school of excellence for Autism run by the Scottish Society of Autism. He went to meet and talk to some teenagers there to show them how he has fitted in with his peers. Most exciting is that in early April, Dale is spending a week with the staff at the dogs for the disabled centre in Banbury to get some insight into how they work as he really wants to work in the assistance dogs area for families that may want to try this approach. One thing that is very clear that all our objectives for writing AFLH and the making of After Thomas has really put ASD on the map where it truly belongs.